Day 3 of acute illness
Thanks to medication, my body temperature went down to 39-40 degrees. I try to consume fewer pills and instead keep the window open and drink water with ice cubes. I wanted to use this time of illness to read something, but my eyes are tired and hurting if I look at something too long. I've had a headache for 3 days, and that doesn't help comprehension.
I haven't been able to visit a store to buy food. One might say I could use a delivery service, but I oppose them and refuse to take part in this side of the economy. I believe that my fellow humans working as delivery drivers are treated as servants by the middle class. I do not think that this job fulfils their human potential. I have reservations about career progression, security, safety, and stability in that industry. I also believe that too often humans use the existence of such services to avoid caring responsibilities. This makes me think about services generally, including counselling and the medical profession. This is not to say that these services cannot be helpful. They are, and I have used the medical system in every country where I've lived. Yet, nothing replaces care and presence.
I get up rarely, to visit the bathroom and to get water. Getting up makes me feel as if I am going to faint.
It was wonderful to receive an email from a fellow human I met in a train to Umeå. We connected instantly and she became my pedagogical mentor. She encouraged me to teach my way. A way that is caring, non-hierarchical, respectful towards students' unique life experiences, views, philosophies, and neurodiversity. She didn't know about my illness but in her email she said that she was thinking about me. It was heart-warming.
My brother who lives far away was sending text messages often. We are not close and we communicate best in different languages, but at this time I felt his kindness and presence. I'm very grateful for it.